I had a conversation with a client the other day about her feeling complacent; having no MOJO to get up and back to her life as many of us are being asked to do after months of being hunkered down (as Leslie Jordan says) in our homes. That conversation prompted this BLOG!
Many years ago, I was interviewed by a nonprofit I was involved with, and they asked a question that changed my life. The question was: What is one of your biggest fears in your professional life? My answer was, “Being complacent in my professional and my personal life!”
COMPLACENT is defined by dictionary.com as “a feeling of quiet pleasure or security, often unaware of some potential danger, defect, or the like; self-satisfaction or smug satisfaction with an existing situation, condition, etc.”
HAVE YOU EVER CONSIDERED YOURSELF COMPLACENT? My personal thought on being complacent is it is when a person has a lack of will or hope to rise above their situation. Also, a lack of MOJO…no passion….no sparkle! Some signs of complacency in your life might be having a lack of ambition, never trying anything new, predictability, you loathe learning new things, reject change, everything is a constant routine, and/or you are stuck or stagnant.
Complacency has been written about in psychology journals, medical articles regarding bad life choices and stress, corporate think tanks, and spiritual newsletters more than you can imagine. Magazines such as Forbes or periodicals such as Huffington Post and the Guardian address complacency often. Titles such as, “10 Signs of Complacency,” “Beating Complacency,” and “Did Complacency Ruin Your Marriage, Your Life, Your Career?” are everywhere on the internet right now.
I saw an article in the Huffington Post the other day called “Lockdown is bringing us closer to the people we love…. even when we’re miles apart.” Now this is amazing! This article is implying that despite plenty of us having been indoors for long periods of time, we have found amazing new ways to connect with those we care about. In fact, we love the tighter bonds we have formed and the quality time we have spent with our friends and families despite our physical distancing. AND we want it to stay this way. Personally, why don’t we keep this new way of being as “the new normal”?
Author Peter Levine suggested that “physical distancing is really what we are doing, rather than social distancing!” If anything, he suggests that we do not want to social distance, and that we NEED the closeness of family, friends, and support groups via a new normal wherein we are reaching through the air waves to let people we love know we love them. That is the social aspect. Of course, he is saying the appropriate physical (social) distancing as recommended by the CDC guidelines is the best way for our health and not spreading COVID-19. For me, personally, I have been physical distancing alone with my two furry friends. I cannot emphasize enough that, without the Zoom calls, texting, and FaceTime, this pandemic would have been deeply emotional for me being “alone-for real.” So, perhaps these new ways of being in the world is “THE NEW NORMAL.”
And then, there is today… There are so many articles on being complacent addressing how we view our personal situation regarding COVID-19. And, more specifically to the point, I want to discuss what “The New Normal” is, and why are people so afraid of it? We’ve heard this new mantra on news channels, news feeds, even some of the political figures are saying, “This COVID-19 situation, social distancing, and wearing masks is “THE NEW NORMAL.” At the same time, the pushback I have heard from clients, neighbors, and friends is, “I just want life to be the way it was…normal again.” But why? What’s wrong with “the new normal?” We got a lot from our “hunkering down” time…. right?
Some thoughts I have as to why “the new normal” makes us so uncomfortable is that we are definitely being asked to step out of our comfort zone. And, most definitely, the status quo has been removed. Remember the saying, “same ‘ole…. same ‘ole” implying we are just hanging, doing what we do, getting along in life? Well, guess what, NOT ANYMORE. Whatever we were doing professionally and personally has been yanked out from under us! We are being asked to raise the bar, allow new everything to emerge! We have all heard people who have emerged from horrific accidents, illnesses, divorce, etc. say that they would have NEVER MADE THE CHANGES IN THEIR LIVES IF THEY WERE NOT FORCED TO!
Let me be clear, I am not downplaying any of the tragic deaths and horrific situations endured by many of our nurses, doctors, service workers, and others who are at high risk every day because of COVID-19. In fact, I am suggesting that by accepting “the new normal,” and questioning any of our complacent tendencies that holds back growth, creates a division that has been embedded in our psyche to create social and political discord, and/or any other healing pieces that do not allow us to love and heal would, in fact, NOT BE honoring the atrocities we have faced these past few months. By paying attention to what needs to be changed by any and all of us is honoring those who have perished and putting them at the top of our deep honoring and respect for them. NOT IN VAIN! Accepting “the new normal” is a bold step for the good of all. We would be modeling the behavior necessary to help us heal as a global heart thread. After all, we are all connected energetically anyway! What you do for you…. you do for all of us! Perhaps it is time to hit the GLOBAL RESET BUTTON!
Jean Houston recently suggested, “This is our time. We can choose to surrender to fear or we can show the world what it means to be thoughtful, to be generous, and to be proactive in helping friends or strangers alike. Perhaps this is an initiation of sorts in which we are invited to step into a new experience of our interdependence and empathy.”
QUESTIONS FOR YOU TO JOURNAL AS TO YOU FINDING YOUR MOJO AGAIN THROUGH UNDERSTANDING COMPLACENCY AND EXPLORING “THE NEW NORMAL” IN OUR WORLD
- Have you thought about what “the new normal” is for you? If so, what will that look like in your personal and professional life?
- Are you complacent? While it seems harmless, can you see where being complacent can be a hindrance in any of the definitions above?
- What are your thoughts about what Jean Houston said about surrendering to fear and showing up in more proactive ways? Does it matter that you do any of it?
- What changes would you like to put in motion?
- Did you create new rituals that you want to continue?